On board POMPEY’S galley, off Misenum

Music plays. Enter two or three SERVANTS with a banquet

    FIRST SERVANT.
Here they’ll be, man. Some o’ their plants are ill-rooted already; the least wind i’ th’ world will blow them down.

    SECOND SERVANT.
Lepidus is high-colour’d.

    FIRST SERVANT.
They have made him drink alms-drink.

    SECOND SERVANT.
As they pinch one another by the disposition, he cries out ‘No more!’; reconciles them to his entreaty and himself to th’ drink.

    FIRST SERVANT.
But it raises the greater war between him and his discretion.

    SECOND SERVANT.
Why, this it is to have a name in great men’s fellowship. I had as lief have a reed that will do me no service as a partizan I could not heave.

    FIRST SERVANT.
To be call’d into a huge sphere, and not to be seen to move in’t, are the holes where eyes should be, which pitifully disaster the cheeks.

A sennet sounded. Enter CÆSAR, ANTONY, LEPIDUS, POMPEY, AGRIPPA, MÆCENAS, ENOBARBUS, MENAS, with other CAPTAINS

    ANTONY.
[To Cæsar] Thus do they, sir: they take the flow o’ th’ Nile
By certain scales i’ th’ pyramid; they know
By th’ height, the lowness, or the mean, if dearth
Or foison follow. The higher Nilus swells
The more it promises; as it ebbs, the seedsman
Upon the slime and ooze scatters his grain,
And shortly comes to harvest.

    LEPIDUS.
Y’have strange serpents there.

    ANTONY.
Ay, Lepidus.

    LEPIDUS.
Your serpent of Egypt is bred now of your mud by the operation of your sun; so is your crocodile.

    ANTONY.
They are so.

    POMPEY.
Sit,—and some wine! A health to Lepidus!

    LEPIDUS.
I am not so well as I should be, but I’ll ne’er out.

    ENOBARBUS.
Not till you have slept. I fear me you’ll be in till then.

    LEPIDUS.
Nay, certainly, I have heard the Ptolemies’ pyramises are very goodly things. Without contradiction I have heard that.

    MENAS.
[Aside to POMPEY] Pompey, a word.

    POMPEY.
                        [Aside to MENAS] Say in mine ear; what is’t?

    MENAS.
[Aside to POMPEY] Forsake thy seat, I do beseech thee, Captain,
And hear me speak a word.

    POMPEY.
[Whispers in’s ear] Forbear me till anon.
This wine for Lepidus!

    LEPIDUS.
What manner o’ thing is your crocodile?

    ANTONY.
It is shap’d, sir, like itself, and it is as broad as it hath breadth; it is just so high as it is, and moves with it own organs. It lives by that which nourisheth it, and the elements once out of it, it transmigrates.

    LEPIDUS.
What colour is it of?

    ANTONY.
Of it own colour too.

    LEPIDUS.
’Tis a strange serpent.

    ANTONY.
’Tis so. And the tears of it are wet.

    CÆSAR.
Will this description satisfy him?

    ANTONY.
With the health that Pompey gives him, else he is a very epicure.

    POMPEY.
[Aside to MENAS] Go, hang, sir, hang!
Tell me of that! Away!
Do as I bid you.—Where’s this cup I call’d for?

    MENAS.
[Aside to POMPEY] If for the sake of merit thou wilt hear me,
Rise from thy stool.

    POMPEY.
[Aside to MENAS] I think th’art mad.
[Rises and walks aside] The matter?

    MENAS.
I have ever held my cap off to thy fortunes.

    POMPEY.
Thou hast serv’d me with much faith.
What’s else to say? Be jolly, lords.

    ANTONY.
                These quicksands, Lepidus,
Keep off them, for you sink.

    MENAS.
Wilt thou be lord of all the world?

    POMPEY.
                                        What say’st thou?

    MENAS.
Wilt thou be lord of the whole world? That’s twice.

    POMPEY.
How should that be?

    MENAS.
                                        But entertain it,
And though you think me poor, I am the man
Will give thee all the world.

    POMPEY.
                                Hast thou drunk well?

    MENAS.
No, Pompey, I have kept me from the cup.
Thou art, if thou dar’st be, the earthly Jove;
Whate’er the ocean pales or sky inclips
Is thine, if thou wilt ha’t.

    POMPEY.
                                Show me which way.

    MENAS.
These three world-sharers, these competitors,
Are in thy vessel. Let me cut the cable;
And when we are put off, fall to their throats.
All there is thine.

    POMPEY.
                Ah, this thou shouldst have done,
And not have spoke on’t. In me ’tis villainy:
In thee’t had been good service. Thou must know
’Tis not my profit that does lead mine honour:
Mine honour, it. Repent that e’er thy tongue
Hath so betray’d thine act. Being done unknown,
I should have found it afterwards well done,
But must condemn it now. Desist, and drink.

    MENAS.
[Aside] For this,
I’ll never follow thy pall’d fortunes more.
Who seeks, and will not take when once ’tis offer’d,
Shall never find it more.

    POMPEY.
This health to Lepidus!

    ANTONY.
Bear him ashore. I’ll pledge it for him, Pompey.

    ENOBARBUS.
Here’s to thee, Menas!

    MENAS.
                                Enobarbus, welcome!

    POMPEY.
Fill till the cup be hid.

    ENOBARBUS.
There’s a strong fellow, Menas.
[Pointing to the servant who carries off Lepidus]

    MENAS.
Why?

    ENOBARBUS.
A’ bears the third part of the world, man; see’st not?

    MENAS.
The third part, then, is drunk. Would it were all,
That it might go on wheels!

    ENOBARBUS.
Drink thou; increase the reels.

    MENAS.
Come.

    POMPEY.
This is not yet an Alexandrian feast.

    ANTONY.
It ripens towards it. Strike the vessels, ho!
Here’s to Cæsar!

    CÆSAR.
                        I could well forbear’t.
It’s monstrous labour when I wash my brain
And it grows fouler.

    ANTONY.
                                Be a child o’ th’ time.

    CÆSAR.
Possess it, I’ll make answer.
But I had rather fast from all four days
Than drink so much in one.

    ENOBARBUS.
                [To ANTONY] Ha, my brave emperor!
Shall we dance now the Egyptian Bacchanals
And celebrate our drink?

    POMPEY.
Let’s ha’t, good soldier.

    ANTONY.
Come, let’s all take hands,
Till that the conquering wine hath steep’d our sense
In soft and delicate Lethe.

    ENOBARBUS.
                                        All take hands.
Make battery to our ears with the loud music,
The while I’ll place you; then the boy shall sing;
The holding every man shall bear as loud
As his strong sides can volley.
[Music plays. ENOBARBUS places them hand in hand]

    CÆSAR.
What would you more? Pompey, good night. Good brother,
Let me request you off; our graver business
Frowns at this levity. Gentle lords, let’s part;
You see we have burnt our cheeks. Strong Enobarb
Is weaker than the wine, and mine own tongue
Splits what it speaks. The wild disguise hath almost
Antick’d us all. What needs more words? Good night.
Good Antony, your hand.

    POMPEY.
                                I’ll try you on the shore.

    ANTONY.
And shall, sir. Give’s your hand.

    POMPEY.
                                                O Antony,
You have my father’s house,—but what? We are friends.
Come, down into the boat.

    ENOBARBUS.
                                        Take heed you fall not.
[Exeunt all but ENOBARBUS and MENAS
Menas, I’ll not on shore.

    MENAS.
                                        No, to my cabin.
These drums! these trumpets, flutes! what!
Let Neptune hear we bid a loud farewell
To these great fellows. Sound and be hang’d, sound out!
[Sound a flourish, with drums

    ENOBARBUS.
Hoo! says a’. There’s my cap.

    MENAS.
Hoo! Noble Captain, come.[Exeunt